2015 and now

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me

 

2015.

 

 I am dedicating this to my sweet Hatton. The above is a quote from the last song I got from her. One of many. I put it on often after work, drive the long way home, and cry. I think we both do. Mainly because it's so sappy and beautiful.

 

The last year has been one of transformation. Of getting on with living and accepting, with joy, my lot. I learned in the smallest way the power of my words. I am trying to speak well to myself. I am also learning to be thankful for what is to come. Before it happens. I can honestly say, I am different. Better. Not Bionic Karen. But Super Karen, using my power for good.

 

So many miracles have happened! Chelsea conceived a sweet baby boy, and we will welcome our little Arliss in the spring. I moved in Robin's lake house and am living and supporting myself like a big girl. I am working at JBBQ and helping raise my angel, Leon. My kids are still perfect. They are my light. I turned 50. That feels cool. I got food poisoning in Vegas and was wheeled out on a  gurney through a resort casino by what had to be men from the paramedic calendar of hotness. That sucked. LSU beat Florida. And I cried less than previous years. I'm still a smart ass, and I work with people who are in to that sort of thing. Earth is a good place to be.

 

I haven't written much this year. I haven't had that kind of energy to spare. I've needed to hoard it like canned food in the zombie apocalypse. But I am feeling...well, I am feeling. My heart is full of love.

 

I don't really want to reduce the last year to events and circumstances. There have been many. But they come and go, and yesterday's big deal is today's triumph. It all comes and goes. There is one thing that remains. Three things actually. Faith, hope, and love. My life is proof of that. And so the next year will continue in that stream.

 

The coming year is upon me. I intend to eat cleaner, practice more yoga, laugh just as much, and enjoy what is to come. Oh, and write more! I used to dread what was next and for good reason. But now I will anticipate the future with hope and interest as to how God will work it all out. I am in a good place. We all are. We just don't always see it.

 

So Happy belated New Year. It's the year of goodness. Of peace. Love you all.