My great friend Kelly and I did the track the other day. We talk when we are not running, and as you know, offer up the straights to various causes. She brought up the fact that Toni, her 3 year old, is finally letting her leave the room at bedtime. Kelly did this by telling Toni that she would sit in the chair by the bed, and when Toni was ready, Kelly would leave. So Toni waited, and in a few minutes told Kelly it was OK. She was ready. I love it! She gave Toni a little power, some control of her situation. She trusted her and respected her feelings. Yes, a 3 year old's feelings. This encompasses everything about raising a child, in my opinion. From day 1, I have always felt that a child is another human being. Someone with perspective. If you just look through their eyes...

We all want some power. Some control of our life. I strongly think that when we don't get that early on, we spend a lifetime looking for it, forcing it, never having enough. It's why we marry into the dysfunction we were raised in. The familiarity and the hope of fixing shit.  I'm classic. My need for validation is insatiable. Hence this blog. I just know I can break that cycle by giving my kids a voice. A chance to be considered and valued. Sometimes it seems silly. Leaving a light on, sitting in a chair by the bed, earrings and various piercings, even some arguing. How will they learn how to do this if not at home? The world is a harsh teacher. Hell, I'm still trying to feel pretty and worth something at 46. I can just see me at 80, charming my way through the day so you'll like me.  I just hope my kids don't have the same holes that I do. I can honestly say, I have deliberately and methodically tried to give them the power. I still do.