Butterfly and Bear

I have learned a lot in the last few days. Some things too big to speak of. One thing that I can speak of is that my spirit animal is a butterfly. I never really thought much about that before, but a medicine woman told me. She told me many things. She said I am a butterfly because all I can do right now is flutter about and try to bring joy to people. And the whole metamorphosis. And the fragility. I get the fragility part.

As I expressed to a few close friends, while the butterfly seems lovely, and I like nothing more than flitting and flying to make people happy, it seems like somebody could easily tear my little wings off. Or clap me in their big hands. Or pin me into one of those science project displays on the Styrofoam. There is a Counting Crows song about scooping a girl up in a butterfly net. Hmmm.
Anyway, I kind of feel vulnerable. They (including the spiritual lady) agreed. But it's where I am.

And so I will learn what I am supposed to learn about being a butterfly. Having once been a different creature, transforming, and becoming something new. Being small and light. Being able to fly. That's nice. And maybe I can sit on a flower every now and then and just breathe. Whatever lessons I am to learn, I want to learn them and move along. I never want to learn some of these things again. Maybe I am still in the cocoon. Not even ready to be seen. Just all wrapped up tightly. Cozy really. The way I have felt before, but this time, alone. I can do this. God help me.

Good night, loves. My next animal on my totem is a bear. Strong things are headed my way. And I like salmon just fine.